Blurb:

Whit Lancaster burst into my life like a storm. Dark and thunderous, furious and fierce. Cold, heartless and devastatingly beautiful, like the statues in our prep school gardens. The school with his family name on the sign. He can do no wrong here. This is his domain.

He’s a menace on campus.  Adored and feared. Hated and respected. His taunting words carve into my skin, shredding me to ribbons. Yet his intense gaze scorches my blood, fills me with a longing I don’t understand.

When I stumble upon him one night alone, I find him broken. Bleeding. My instincts scream to leave and let him suffer, but I can’t. I sneak him into my room. Clean him up. Fall for his lies. Let him possess every single part of me until I’m the one left a gasping, broken mess.

When he leaves me alone in the dead of night, he takes my journal with him.

Now he knows all my secrets. My hate. My truth. And he promises to use my words against me. I’ll be ruined if my darkest secret gets out.

That’s when I strike a bargain with the devil.

I’ll let Whit Lancaster ruin me behind closed doors instead.

My Review:

The Things I Wanted To Say is a dark, bully romance with a bit of mystery and intrigue added to break up the unconventional love story of Whittaker Lancaster and Summer Savage. Whit is not a pleasant guy right from the start but he does very slowly improve. Summer will get your sympathy but at times I wanted to shake her to come to her senses. They have a strange relationship but underneath they do care and love each other even though they show it in bizarre ways. 

This couple first meet when fourteen at a party at his parents apartment. She had been happily sneaking champagne to forget her problems when she first saw him. She was fascinated by him as he was so intense and handsome but never smiled. She becomes intrigued by this mysterious angry boy who is infuriating but tantalising because no one has ever spoken to her the dirty way he does. He calls her names, tells lies about her mother and is very suggestive. He makes fun of her as she doesn’t know who he is, then grabs and kisses her. Summer knows it wrong and twisted to like him but she has always felt the darkness inside her. 

Three years later a catalogue of events leads to Summer having to change school for her senior year. There has been a very public family scandal involving her mother, a recurring private wrongdoing by her step brother Yates and a tragic incident at the family home. Summer’s childhood has been full of turbulence and she has done well to survive it all. She found it helped to write down all her thoughts and what happened to her in a journal. It is this journal which gives this book it’s title. However, there are somethings she has written down which should never see the light of day and are her secrets to keep. 

Whit Lancaster rules Lancaster Prep and hates Summer. He is still the handsome boy she was attracted to but is now dangerous and powerful. He is untouchable at school so is cruel and mean to her, turning the whole school against her. He hates her and her family so is out for revenge. He attempts to make her life miserable and wants to ruin her but she relishes in his darkness. 

Summer hears rumours about his depravity and sadistic tendencies towards females. Eventually she finds one friend in Sylvie but is suspicious when it turns out she is Whit’s sister. Sylvie isn’t bothered about what their parents have done as both sets are selfish and don’t think about their children. Summer hates Whit but can’t deny the pull and connection she feels to him. 

They begin a tortuous affair full of rude comments and pain. She hates herself for wanting him but also wonders what happened to make him so damaged. He has been obsessed with her since the party and knows she hiding secrets. I liked she had a backbone and really tried to stand up to Whit and his friends. She scares him as much as he does her. He surprised me with his jealousy and fighting to protect her when he has caused everything. 

“Sometimes I would think you weren’t real. You couldn’t be that perfect,” he says as he slowly starts to move, pulling himself almost completely out of my body before pushing back in.

“But you are real. It’s as if you were made for me.”

I feel the same way about him. As if he were made for only me.

Montgomery Michaels the IV deserves a book of his own. I absolutely adored this secondary character who brought so much fun and light into this couples dark and disturbing story. Sylvie is even more complex and full of surprises, some not very nice ones but she is entertaining no less. One minute I thought she was going to be a good friend to Summer then the next I wanted to wring her neck when she was worse than her brother. I had an inkling about what his mother has done and was pleased when Whit went against her plans for him. However don’t get me started about Summer’s mother because she was awful and wound me up with her blasé attitude to everything.

To me the story dragged a bit as all their secrets are revealed and we find out what their parents have been up to. I do admit I felt sorry for Summer and some of the horrendous things she has been through.This couple were a perfect match as they hate each other as much as they love each other. The final part of the story did pick up and I liked how she made him work hard to win her back. Overall a good story especially if you like a mean bully boy who comes good but I found it a bit too long.